MY LIVING SITUATION

Its now 1:00 and I get paid today. There so much I want to do with my money but I cant. Right now I'm in the worst living situation someone could ever be in. You ever been to someone's house and the environment was so uncomfortable that you never wanted to visit ever again. Where if they wanted to just go in for a minute just to use the bathroom you would be like "Naw I'm okay ill stay in the car". Whelp when I first met my wife she introduced me to her mom and her family. When I first came over I just got a bad vibe about my surroundings and I hardly ever wanted to even visit let alone stay there. Now I'm here I mostly stay to myself because people are fake in this house. The mom "Ms. Candy" thinks I'm rude because I never say good morning when i wake up but i mean come on waking up here ain't never been good, so why lie. Things are not as bad as they use to be tho, I eased up a little bit...still keep to myself I don't need to talk anyone let alone let them know my business.

Okay this is the last one for today my eyes hurt...Kay thanks. LOL

  Life isn't as bad as I make it. I am blessed in many ways and I need to appreciate life a little more.
I am a very private person. I'm the type that knows I'm not the prettiest girl but will look in the mirror every chance I get hoping to see something different then I seen the last time I checked.Maybe since I'm getting older now a nice pointy nose will transform from this flat run-away slave looking thing I have now. Or maybe I just took longer than usual to grow into my ears. Maybe the older I get the better I look and my hair line wont keep running away from my face making my forehead gi-normous!! LOL... I know what your thinking "It will never happen" but what kind of attitude is that?? Martin Luther-King and Obama had a dream...so can I LOL.  People say I'm beautiful and I see it... sometimes... and I wonder do other people know that I'm only part-time beautiful. I mean I don't wear make up so maybe when people realize that I'm beautiful that day I just had a lot of sleep or something. Normally I would think they was trying to run game...but I get a lot of compliments from older and old wrinkly ugly women so it kind of makes me feel like "um...thanks but no". Shit all I know is they probably think they beautiful too. lmao.. I'm big on my looks because honestly that is the only thing I have to show for and I'm not even ALL THAT or ever THAT... so I basically have close to nothing to show for my 20 almost 21 years of living. I'm not smart at all, and I know that and to top it off I'm also married to a person that is so smart and so resourceful that she unintentionally reminds me of how dumb I really am. Ha ha I gotta tell you I got my eye brows done the other day and tell my why in the hell one eye brow look like I'm excited and the other like I wanted to cry. So now I got this bipolar eyebrow combo looking thing on my face and now I look like crap forreal! Thank god that my eye brows are growing back and its not permanent like a tattoo or something because um I think I would have been jumped off a bridge and killed myself by now. Gotta go. I bet this made you laugh waaaay before it made you feel bad for me! LOL ttyl